OK, kids, it's time for an easy-n-fun game the whole family can play! Let's play a funfilled round of What Did The Asshole Actually Mean?
First off, read the above story. I'll wait.
Good, you're back. Now, when Pat Robertson, everyone's favorite paragon of tolerance, said 'take him out', did he mean:
A) That some hot, young Special Forces guy should show up on Hugo Chavez' doorstep bearing flowers, take him dining and dancing, overwhelm him with charisma, and make him fall in love with aforementioned Special Forces Guy, thereby resulting in them buying an apartment in Greenwich Village, getting involved in animal rights and Gay Pride, and staying away from silly things like being a dictator;
B) That Bud Selig, Commissioner of Major League Baseball, should 'take him out' to the ballgame -- IE, provide Chavez with season tickets to a team of his choice (naturally throwing in the Cheezy Nachos, the Smokey Dogs, the Cracker Jack, and an unending supply of Miller Lite)? (This would, of course, convince Chavez of the superiority of the American way of life, providing the US with an endless cheap supply of Venezuelan oil -- thereby making all those yuppies who bought SUVs and are now frittering away their kids' college money on Super Unleaded happier.)
C) Was Pat Robertson, a self-described follower of Jesus Christ and major spiritual influence on our current president, advocating the assassination of a foreign leader?
You have thirty seconds.
*Jeopardy theme plays*